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Volkswagen axes Polo GTI, confirms hot hatches now only for people with moneyMaguire confirms NSW respects Queensland 'very much', plans to say it again tomorrowSBS doc on Gulpilil proves restraint isn't boring, it's just rareMargot Robbie, Jacob Elordi somehow make Wuthering Heights workCoalition to tie migration to housing, hopes no one does the mathsPenrith woman confirms $300 rebate equals 6.2 cents per hour, will spend on petrolCanberra secures aircraft to fly home six people who really, really want to leave boatTreasurer confirms $11.40 weekly tax relief, nation advised to feel gratefulVolkswagen axes Polo GTI, confirms hot hatches now only for people with moneyMaguire confirms NSW respects Queensland 'very much', plans to say it again tomorrowSBS doc on Gulpilil proves restraint isn't boring, it's just rareMargot Robbie, Jacob Elordi somehow make Wuthering Heights workCoalition to tie migration to housing, hopes no one does the mathsPenrith woman confirms $300 rebate equals 6.2 cents per hour, will spend on petrolCanberra secures aircraft to fly home six people who really, really want to leave boatTreasurer confirms $11.40 weekly tax relief, nation advised to feel grateful
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The byline

Jed Carmichael

Brisbane, QLD

Jed Carmichael is Brainrot's Editor-at-Large and weekly columnist. A former regional-paper subeditor who quit when his masthead was bought by a property developer, Jed writes on the slow structural collapse of Australian weekend vibes, the Australian male's relationship with a low-mileage Camry, and the increasing unreadability of the "one quiet one". He is a composite character; his words are written by the Brainrot desk.